Okay, okay, settle down now. Yes it's me, Will Malpass, renowned creator of THE MAIN THING, the blog that searches for reality's deeper truths in a mostly-lighthearted-but-occasionally-serious way. Please calm down though, okay?
Look, I understand I have my own website. Sure, that's impressive—I get it. But I'm just a regular guy, really.
For example, I live in an ordinary house in a characteristic suburban neighborhood. And if I were to invite you over to old "Malpass Manor" and show you around, you'd see it's filled with the typical furnishings of a representative middle-class family. Yawn. Nothing special, really.
But then at the end of our tour, I'd probably feel compelled to show you my closet, where you'd no doubt notice my extensive t-shirt collection. And then you'd get all excited again, because of the remarkable number and colorful variety of t-shirts I own.
Feel free to gaze in wonderment at this image from Closet 1, T-Shirt Shelves B and C. Admittedly, it's overwhelming. (Also, there are many more t-shirts in my collection that I wasn't able to fit in this photo. Next time I'll use the panoramic setting.)
Hmm. That IS quite a large collection of t-shirts, isn't it? Perhaps you'd be justified to think to yourself, "Gosh, look at them! SO MANY! How could one man own all these marvelous t-shirts? Am I in the presence of a Mighty King?"
But no. Though I happen to have an impressively large t-shirt collection, it doesn't make me a Mighty King.
I'm just a regular guy. I put my pants on one leg at a time. And I put my t-shirts on one at a time as well. Unlike the internationally-famous Sanath Bandara of Colombo, Sri Lanka, who set the world record by wearing 257 t-shirts at once. Now that's impressive!